Sexual Assaults, What They Are, How to Recognise One And What to do When This Happens to You or to Someone Else

 

Sexual Assaults

Today we'll talk about sexual assaults, what they are, how to recognise one, and what to do when this happens to you or to someone else.

A little important premise, this post may contain sensitive contents for some of you, so, if you're uncomfortable reading this due to private reasons, skip it.

«What's a Sexual Assault?»

"Sexual assault" (abbreviated SA) is defined as a sexual act or act of a sexual nature performed against the victim's clear and unequivocal consent. Some examples of sexual assault are as follows: Attempts at rape; Fondling or unwanted sexual contact; Forcing the victim into performing sexual acts such as oral sex on the perpetrator or penetrating the perpetrator's body. 

Don't get me wrong, though, a sexual assault can be non-verbal too, that is staring in a perverse way (like what happened to me) and comments with a sexual meaning.

Now, people who experienced sexual assaults sometimes undergo deep traumas, and due to this they don't report the crime to the cops, the action making people (who're stupid as hell) think that the victim ENJOYED it, when she/he (everyone can experience a sexual assault) clearly didn't.

You can see in the image I put for this post some common phrases that people often say to sexual assault victims when they don't believe her/him.

And they're clearly something stupid to say to the victim.

For example, the «But you didn't scream» sentence doesn't justify the assaulter. Some people, during the assault, enter in a state of pure fear where their brain goes in tilt, not being able to react and to punch the idiot who's assaulting them.

Or the «She/he would never do that» sentence. Well, dear, she/he DID, so shut your mouth and comfort your son/daughter, who's clearly been through a lot.

«But How do You Recognise One?»

Well, dear, it's very simple: it's called sexual assault when you're forced, manipulated or coerced into sexual activity, without your explicit consent.

For example, if someone tells you «Come on, don't be a baby, it won't hurt a bit!», and you keep answering with a strict «NO», but he/she keeps touching you, then that's a sexual assault.

If someone stares at you in a way that makes you uncomfortable, as if you're an object for their desire, that's harassment and it's considered sexual assault.

So, briefly, sexual assault is an action, made from someone intentionally, that makes you uncomfortable and crosses your boundaries.

«What do I do if This Happens to Me or to Someone Else?»

If this happens to you, don't hesitate to talk about this to an adult, or to a person who you trust the most, like your mother, father or a friend.

And don't feel guilty. You didn't do anything wrong, it was the assaulter's fault.

Don't be afraid and IMMEDIATELY report this to the police, who'll make sure to arrest that moron and make you feel safe.

If this happens to someone else, and they trust you, make them feel safe and believe what they tell you.

However, if he/she chooses to not report this to the police, you have to respect it, without a «what if».

«What if I Have Nobody to Vent About my Trauma?»

The trauma you're dealing with can show in many ways, such as a nightmare, as a flashback, as a panic attack, or as an emotional numbness.

There are lots of places where you can seek help, to relief the trauma, so you don't suffer anymore like you do.

For example, you can go to a therapist, who'll never share a single thing about it to anyone, or you can talk to someone who already experienced what you did and can help you get through it like someone else did to him/her.

To sum up, no matter the channel or circumstances, assault is never the fault of the victim. It is crucial to note that the healing process is gradual. There should always be an offer of support. You should listen and respect their decisions, no matter whether it is someone close to you who has suffered an assault or yourself.

If you or someone you know has experienced sexual assault, know that help is available. You are not alone: there are available resources to secure help. You deserve to feel safe, heard, so find a trusted adult, a therapist, or a hotline for help. 

It's 100% possible to heal!

Remember, your voice matters. Speak up, get help, and know that you are believed.

Take care and stay strong. 

Have a good day/afternoon/evening/night!

-Rose❤️